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*SELF-HELP FROM OTHERS: *

You say I need a job
I got my own business
You wanna know what I do?
None of your fucking business!
Fugazi- "Repeater"

Everything I like to do is either illegal, immoral, or fattening.
Alexander Woolcott

You can only be young once
but you can always be immature.
Dave Barry

It is convenient
that there should be gods,
so let us believe that there are!
Ovid

The colon has more effect than the comma,
less power to separate than the semicolon,
and more formality than the dash.
Strunk and White
The Elements of Style




*BOOKS CURRENTLY READING: *
The Collected Poems of W. B. Yeats
by W. B. Yeats [1996]
Engineering in the Ancient World:
Revised Edition

by J. G. Landels [2000]
The Meters of Greek and Latin Poetry
by James W. Halporn [1994]
European Literature
And the Latin Middle Ages

by Ernst Robert Curtius [1973]
The Jugurthine War and
The Conspiracy of Catiline

by Sallust [1963 translation]
Introduction to Manuscript Studies
by Raymond Clemens [2007]
Anthology of European Romantic Poetry
by Michael Ferber [2005]

*BOOKS COMPLETED: *
summer 2005
The Aeneid
by Vergil [trans. 1981]
Romaji Diary and Sad Toys
by Takuboku Ishikawa [1909 & 1912]
Greece in the Making: 1200-429 BC
by Robin Osborne [1996]
Spectacles of Death in Ancient Rome
by Donald G. Kyle [1998]
Roman Aqueducts and Water Supply
by A. Trevor Hodge [1992]
fall 2005
What's The Matter With Kansas?
by Thomas Frank [2004]
Maus II
by Art Spiegelman [1986]
Sapphics Against Anger
by Timothy Steele [1986]
The Diamond Age
or A Young Lady's Illustrated Primer

by Neal Stephenson [1995]
The Decline and Fall of the Roman Empire
by Edward Gibbon
[abrdg. 1987]
spring 2006
Law, Sexuality, and Society:
The Enforcement of Morals in Classical Athens

by David Cohen [1991]
Kosmos: Essays in Order,
Conflict and Community in Classical Athens

edited by Paul Cartledge, Paul Millett
and Sitta von Reden [1998]
summer 2006
As The Romans Did: A Sourcebook
In Roman Social History (Second Edition)
by
Jo-Ann Shelton [1998]
Franz Kafka: The Complete Stories
by Franz Kafka [trans. 1971]
Understanding Greek Vases:
A Guide to Terms, Styles, and Techniques

by Andrew J. Clark, Maya Elston,
and Mary Louise Hart [2002]
The Annals of Imperial Rome
by Tacitus [trans. 1956]
Four Plays By Aristophanes
by Aristophanes [trans. 1961/1962/1964]
Early Greek Vase Painting
by John Boardman [1998]
The Iliad
by Homer [trans. 1974]
The Reign of the Phallus:
Sexual Politics in Ancient Athens

by Eva C. Keuls [1985]
Crabwalk
by Günter Grass [2002]
The Picture of Dorian Gray
by Oscar Wilde [1891]
A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man
by James Joyce [1916]
The Poetry of Friedrich Nietzsche
by Philip Grundlehner [1986]
Ancient Greek Laws: A Sourcebook
by Ilias Arnaoutoglou [1998]
Pu der Bär
by A. A. Milne [deutsch edition: 1973]
Interpreting Greek Tragedy:
Myth, Poetry, Text

by Charles Segal [1986]
Greek Tragedy
by Erich Segal [1983]
Revenge in Attic and Later Greek Tragedy
by Anne Pippin Burnett [1998]
The Birth of Tragedy
by Friedrich Nietzsche [1871]
fall 2006
Art and Experience in Classical Greece
by J. J. Pollitt [1972]
The Oresteia
by Aeschylus [date forgotten]
Greek Sculpture: The Late Classical Period
by John Boardman [1995]
The Sculptures of the Parthenon:
Aesthetics and Interpretation

by Margaretha Rossholm Lagerlöf [2000]
The Decline and Fall of Virgil
in Eighteenth-Century Germany
THE REPRESSED MUSE

by Geoffrey Atherton [2006]
The Odyssey
translated from Homer by George Chapman [1614]
The German Tradition of Psychology
in Literature and Thought, 1700-1840

by Matthew Bell [2005]
Sixty Poems of Martial, in translation
by Dudley Fitts [1967]
Fourth-Century Styles in Greek Sculpture
by Brunilde Sismondo Ridgway [1997]
Mass and Elite in Democratic Athens:
Rhetoric, Ideology, and the
Power of the People

by Josiah Ober [1989]
Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close
by Jonathan Safran Foer [2005]
spring 2007
The Craft of Poetic Speech in Ancient Greece
by Claude Calame [1995 English translation]
Allusions and Intertext:
Dynamics of Appropriation in Roman Poetry

by Stephen Hinds [1996]
summer 2007
The History of the Peloponnesian War
by Thucydides [431 BCE]
The Stranger
by Albert Camus [1942]
The Bell Jar
by Sylvia Plath [1963]
Dubliners
by James Joyce [1914]
Illuminations
by Walter Benjamin [1969]
Oedipus at Colonus:
Sophocles, Athens, and the World

by Andreas Markantanotos [2007]
Human, All Too Human
by Friedrich Nietsche [1878]
Ovid- The Erotic Poems
translated by Peter Green [1982]
Candide
by Voltaire [1759]
The Sorrows of Young Werther
by Johann Wolfgang von Goethe [1774]
fall 2007
Choke
by Chuck Palahniuk [2001]
Thus Spoke Zarathustra
by Friedrich Nietzsche [1883]
The Cambridge Companion to Greek Tragedy
edited by P. E. Easterling [1997]
A Poetry Handbook
by Mary Oliver [1994]
The Latin Sexual Vocabulary
by J. N. Adams [1982]
spring 2008
Word Order in Greek Tragic Dialogue
by Helma Dik [2007]
Wintering
by Kate Moses [2003]
A History of Greek Literature:
From Homer to the Hellenistic Period

by Albrecht Dihle [1991]
Njal's Saga
by author unknown
Brave New World
by Aldous Huxley [1932]
Gorgias
by Plato
The Saga of the Volsungs
by author unknown
The Poetic Edda
by author unknown [various dates]
Reflections:
Essays, Aphorisms, and
Autobiographical Writings

by Walter Benjamin [1978]
Doctor Faustus
by Christopher Marlowe [1592]
The Nibelungenlied
by an unknown poet [1200]
Reading Greek Tragedy
by Simon Goldhill [1986]
Phaedrus
by Plato
The Power of Images
in the Age of Augustus

by Paul Zanker [1988]
Caesar's Civil War
by William W. Batstone
and Cynthia Damon
[2006]
Caesar: The Civil War
translation by John Carter [1998]
summer 2008
Before You Leap:
A Frog's-Eye View of Life's
Greatest Lessons

by Kermit the Frog [2006]
Edda
by Snorri Sturluson [1220]
Selected Poems
by T. S. Eliot [1930]
The Elements of Style Illustrated
by Strunk and White [1929]
100 Years of Solitude
by Gabriel Garcia Marquez [1967]
Not Much Fun: The Lost Poems of Dorothy Parker
by Dorothy Parker [1996]
Collected Poems
by Emily Dickinson []
Byron's Poetry
by George Gordon, Lord Byron []
Small Gods
by Terry Pratchett [1994]
Memories of My Melancholy Whores
by Gabriel Garcia Marquez [2004]
On The Road
by Jack Kerouac [1951]
fall 2008
Greek Love Reconsidered
by Thomas K. Hubbard [2000]
On Translating Homer
by Matthew Arnold [1862]
The Invention of Love
by Tom Stoppard [1998]
Erotic Tales of Medieval Germany
by Albrecht Classen [2007]
Long, Long Ago
by Alexander Woollcott [1943]
In the Vineyard of the Text:
A Commentary to Hugh's Didascalicon

by Ivan Illich [1996]
The Communist Manifesto
by Karl Marx and Friedrich Engels [1847]
Selected Poems
by Elizabeth Barrett Browning [1988]
Textual Criticism
by Paul Maas [1958]
Medieval Studies: An Introduction
(Second Edition)

edited by James M. Powell [1992]
Juvenal: The Sixteen Satires
translated by Peter Green [1974]
Latin Paleography: Antiquity
and the Middle Ages

by Bernhard Bischoff [1979]
Less Than Zero
by Bret Easton Ellis [1985]
The Complete Fairy Tales of the Brothers Grimm
translated by Jack Zipes [2003]
Old Christmas
by Washington Irving [1819]
spring 2009
Heinrich von Kleist: Plays
edited by Walter Hinderer [1982]
East of the Sun
and West of the Moon

illustrated by Kay Nielsen [1914]
The History of Make-Believe:
Tacitus on Imperial Rome

by Holly Haynes [2003]
The Pooh Perplex
by Frederick Crews [2003]
Over to You: Ten stories
of fliers and flying

by Roald Dahl [1946]
Pride and Prejudice
by Jane Austen [1813]
The History of Sexuality, Volume I:
An Introduction

by Michel Foucault [1976]
The History of Sexuality, Volume II:
The Use of Pleasure

by Michel Foucault [1985] The History of Sexuality, Volume III:
The Care of the Self

by Michel Foucault [1980]
1976 The Sandman: Endless Nights
by Neil Gaiman [2003]
The Poems of Wilfred Owen
collected by Jon Stallworthy [1986]
Wykked Wyves and the Woes of Marriage:
Misogamous Literature From Juvenal to Chaucer

by Elizabeth M. Makowski and Katharina M. Wilson [1990]
Good Omens: The Nice
and Accurate Prophecies
of Agnes Nutter, Witch

by Terry Pratchett and Neil Gaiman [1990]
Breakfast at Tiffany's
by Truman Capote [1950]
Greek Word Order
by K. J. Dover [1960]
Caesar's Calendar: Ancient Time
and the Beginnings of History

by Denis Feeney [2007]
Latin Language and Latin Culture
from ancient to modern times

by Joseph Farrell [2001]
Old Christmas
by Washington Irving [1824]
The Annals
by Tacitus, A. J. Woodman trans. [2004]
40 Short Stories:
A Portable Anthology, Second Edition

by Beverly Lawn [2004]







HAUNTS:
Archaeology
Get Fuzzy

*TASKS: *
:: read another book ::
:: study, like a good egg ::

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Of course, I did not create this template myself. These people did:

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First Day of School Report- Summer, Year Fifteen
Tuesday, May 29, 2007

I believe I finally solved the coding problem that prevented my blogspot from appearing. I had no time during the spring semester to check or correct the page, but office shifts provide ample opportunity for editing and general computer-dicking-arounding. In between checking bank accounts, my school e-mail, and Facebook, I actually had to complete some work last night, for once, checking a group of high school students into the dormitory. They matriculate for summer school classes in order to learn about the "college experience". I no longer care for the college experience, at least not as it exists at Tech. Most of the students here don't have shit for brains.

However, there are still plenty of decent, intelligent people walking around. For instance, as I stood in front of the Foreign Language building this afternoon, awaiting a ride, I noticed two ladies in the parking lot talking to each other in Spanish. One drove away in her car, and the other approached the building. She was wearing a fanny pack, black leggings that came down to mid-calf, sunglasses, and a white Tech t-shirt. I presumed she was a professor who had just finished jogging or working out and was coming by her office to pick up or drop something off. She stopped and greeted me before she went in- she asked if I had liked my classes the first day, I rattled off the three languages I am trying to learn, she told me good luck, and as she opened the door, she said something to the extent of, 'Well, I'm the custodian for this building, so keep up with your schooling, or you'll wind up like me- dusting, and mopping the floors!' She's more of a human being than the sassy, gum-chewing little brats who wear sweat pants with "PINK" splayed across the ass, throw the school's fifth-grade reading-level newspaper on the floor, and walk by her as though she doesn't exist.

I hate people, but this applies to everyone, indiscriminately. I place everyone I meet on a Scale of Tolerance, on which they advance, remain in some state of homostasis, or fall back, according to the several interactions we may have. Facebook statistics to the contrary (I apparently am "friends" with one hundred eighty-four people at Tech alone), I consider all people on the planet to be my enemies- my best friends, of course, being the greatest enemies of all. I keep them close in order that I may the more effectively destroy them.

I brought Kermit the Frog to the office to keep me company during my shift this evening. As one of my fellow employees picked him up, I introduced Kermie as the frog I sleep with every night. Suddenly Kermie was dropped.

I have been told I have issues.


    [Lauree Frances Keith concluded this diatribe at 5:45 PM]



Laß dich, Geliebte, nicht reun, daß du mir so schnell dich ergeben!
Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Der Grair Bär gave my term paper (finally entitled, "Gelegenheit in Goethe's Römische Elegien") an "A+". Now I may sleep. On the first two pages he made a few editing marks, which had me apprehensive about the next nineteen pages to follow, but for the most part, I did fine.

He had my previous drafts in front of him, to which he apparently conferred to be certain I had revised problematic sections. A few days before, Adrian had spent several hours reading through the paper to make comments and suggestions, many of which helped immensely, for Der Grair Bär specifically noted, 'much improved', 'better', etc. at those places where I provided additional elaboration after Adrian's editing.

I had a solid conclusion that apparently hit directly upon the point Dr. Grair wanted me to make- namely, that the Römische Elegien are a romantic, rather than a classical, work. Despite being inspired by the "classical" genre of elegy, I felt that Goethe merely used elegy as the medium for the expression of romantic themes. His main character (or interlocutor) strives for different goals than those of the three main Augustan poets (Ovid, Catullus, and Propertius) Goethe admired. The political and cultural climate in which he wrote, it hardly has to be stated, affected his writing in a different manner.

More importantly, Dr. Grair took the time to type three pages of commentary on my writing. Two paragraphs are praise, two and-a-half pages are suggestions for improvement, if I were to publish this as a scholarly paper. I am not precise, clear, or consistent, which is exactly what scholarly papers are supposed to be. I prefer to allude, to make nebulous statements, to provide minimal explanation, and above all, to avoid road-mapping. But a scholar wants to know, before he's read something, whether or not he can cite it in his own term paper/dissertation/article. Screw that. If I put in so much effort to write something, I consider my reader an unhappy captive of my will. He must read every word (perhaps whole pages two or three times over) in order to understand any part of my argument, and then the entire composition.

Enough. Time to sleep.


    [Lauree Frances Keith concluded this diatribe at 3:04 PM]



Healthy Competition
Monday, May 14, 2007

Yesterday I attended the wedding of Mr. Steve Burham and Ms. Amanda Morris, which was lovely and free from anxiety (at least for the guests). I never see enough of them, and they have both come to mean quite a bit to me. I was even pleased to dress like a girl for them.

Unfortunately, I was not around when Amanda tossed the bouquet. I need a man, because I suddenly have a craving for peanut butter and jelly. But I cannot open a jelly jar with my own two hands. I am aware that various companies currently market squeeze tubes of jelly, but they cannot possibly liken themselves to the jars with cartoon characters my parents bought when I was a wee Lauree. We reused the jars as drink glasses, since we were too po' to keep buying more child-sized glass sets every time we broke a glass. To my understanding, we were not alone in this practice, as I recall having seen some in the kitchen cabinet when I stayed with The Father and the new Wicked Stepfamily.

Yesterday I also completed a twenty-one page term paper for den Grair Bär. In revising it last night, I found I had over-used all my words for "find". I sat, hands poised over the keyboard, licking my teeth as I ran through all the other verbs I had used already, until I settled with "come upon". The sentence now reads:
Nature (jene buschige Myrte) provides the places where the wanderer and his beloved may come upon each other and themselves.
Adrian told me I should leave it as is, because it's ballsy. This is also precisely the reason for leaving it out. But then, Der Grair Bär isn't bipolar (like a couple of other professors I've had) when it comes to grading; hopefully, he'll just giggle and write a big red exclamation point out to the side. I have figured out that writing an exclamation point to the side of the text as he proofs it is Der Grair Bär's code for indicating he finds the idea provocative.

So much now to do. So little Lauree. I do hope to come upon myself this summer.


    [Lauree Frances Keith concluded this diatribe at 12:43 PM]



Where Are The Creme-Coloured Ponies?
Saturday, May 05, 2007

Yesterday my older sister informed me that she is preggers. She and The Love Matt broke up for a year, but reconciled (pretty heavily, apparently- heh-heh). She has yet to inform The Father, who she suspects may not take well to the news. I told her it really is not any of his business. He doesn't support her in any way, so if the fact that Ashlea Gayle Keith and Mr. Matthew Mims are not married bothers him (or Terri, rather), he can cram it with walnuts. Ashlea and Matt are by no means flawless, but they are perfectly capable of being loving, supportive parents. Our father, unfortunately, is neither, even being not-quite-fifty by now and having had five kids of his own. He does change diapers with high-level adroitness.

Otherwise, I am genuinely excited for them. I am ready to spoil my very first niece-or-nephew. I told Ashlea to call me, if she needs help with names. I suggested "Zeppo" for a boy.


    [Lauree Frances Keith concluded this diatribe at 6:40 AM]





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