Tuesday, May 31, 2005
I bought textbooks this afternoon; their glossy covers and unbent spines are refreshing. I refrained from laughing when the book boy, as he manually entered the price for Eike's class book, informed me, 'And you do know this is $60.75, right?' All I know is that it had dadgum well better be the most enlightening piece of literature I read this summer.
The people who work behind the library reference desk never use their library voices. Usually this would not awaken my irascibility, but their conversations with each other are always banal, and their phone communications likewise are boring. I want to hurl my pen drive at the bookish (anyone who works in a library is "bookish") little man over there now- he types too loud, too.
I anticipate a smooth summer routine beginning tomorrow (when school again commences).
[Lauree Frances Keith concluded this diatribe at 1:44 PM]
Getting Ink Done
Monday, May 30, 2005
I have been studying for Latin class. Das ist alles.
Concarare is Latin for "to shit".
[Lauree Frances Keith concluded this diatribe at 6:16 AM]
Hiding My Head In The Sand
Saturday, May 28, 2005
Tomorrow (tonight) at midnight commences the first office shift, wherein I sit around at the computer or read while no one comes to me with problems. When dibsing schedule spots, I selected as many late night or early morning sections as possible, thereby ensuring (hopefully) that I shall not be disturbed- for it is desirous to avoid working, except during actual conference check-ins.
The department heads of staff have had training meetings, with goofy ice-breaker games that I did not at all care for. We gathered into a standing circle, with someone positioned at the center who would point at someone in the circle, say some trigger word, and get that person to do something ridiculous. One such was "Fire Hydrant"- the person pointed to had to stand while the people on either side lifted their legs to straddle him/her.
I prefer more conventional methods of getting to know people.
[Lauree Frances Keith concluded this diatribe at 11:41 AM]
My Freckles Are Darkening
Wednesday, May 25, 2005
The girl who cut my hair (her name is "Kat") at the hair-cutting place put in some aromatic volumizer that I bought afterward. It looks and feels rather similar to a certain male ejaculate, but it makes my hair shiny and it smells like a mixture of fruits. The constant waft around my head makes me a little ill, though...
I begin training tomorrow for the summer position, just sitting through a meeting or two, sipping water, smiling in all the right places. Pretending I'm "friendly", in the conventional manner, is quite exhausting. Holding the inane, salesgirl smile for extended periods literally hurts my cheeks.
Dumbing myself down everywhere has me concerned that I actually have become dumb...er...
[Lauree Frances Keith concluded this diatribe at 9:54 AM]
"Vacation" Means Not Bathing Every Day
Sunday, May 22, 2005
My finger smells like Nutella- as the label advertises, it tastes good on everything. Earlier this morning I walked to the gas station to cash in two (2) Dr. Pepper and two (2) Coca-Cola caps for a total of four (4) one-liter bottles of carbonated goodness. I put them in a recently-acquired minifridge, which is rapidly proving itself quite possibly the single greatest investment of my college career thus far.
Other than sleeping, reading, and eating (occuring in no particular order), I have done little with this short break time. I did reflect the other day on how little time I now spend reflecting on things, when I used to reflect often on things reflectable, but in reflection even that was short-lived.
I checked out an ancient Greek history book from the library, which narrates through archaeological and literary documentation, often in a manner as follows: "Herodotus tells us..." "We have also, according to Pausanias..." All the "we" stuff irritates me when I read anything, because although Herodotus was a sort of historian, he was not writing for me. He is not my friend, and he is divulging no secret to me alone. The author of the current book is no buddy of mine, either, and I resent his including me in the discussion. I'd rather he pay my tuition.
I like books more than I like people.
[Lauree Frances Keith concluded this diatribe at 11:56 AM]
Luke, I Am Your... D'Oh!
Thursday, May 19, 2005
James dropped by unexpectedly to invite me to a midnight showing of Star Wars, which I of course accepted. James' friend, Mike, bought three tickets (another girl, Christina, had the third), operating on the assumption that James would sneak in under the wing of a friend who works at the theater (however, for this or that reason, James ended up having to pay). It was good company.
The last three films, I have felt, are in no way comparable to the original three. The bogus acting made me nauseous, and the stories were not conveyed well, cinematically. They were entertaining enough at the theater, but wholly disappointing, as with everything else I encounter. Oh, well.
Moment of hilarity: Padme, telling Anakin about her pregnancy, asks, "What are we going to do?" Mike responds, "Baby, we're going to the clinic." James threw popcorn, the rest of which he later spilled on my foot and the floor twenty minutes before the movie ended.
My right eye leaked the entire time, because I had a tremendous headache from this cold. When James dropped me off at the dorm, I did look like a Sith. I downed a substantial amount of NyQuil and lay on my bed with my eyes shut, waiting for the drugs to take effect, but I had to blink every few seconds to clear the tears.
My body is falling apart.
[Lauree Frances Keith concluded this diatribe at 9:13 AM]
Ca-Thunk
Tuesday, May 17, 2005
Reading a book about Greek archaeology last night, I giggled over this line: We have very little evidence about where most people were living in the twelfth and eleventh centuries BC, because the vast majority of material... comes from graves.
Tech only offers an ancient civilizations archaeology course once every three or four years, which means I must research that field on the side until graduate school. One of the classics professors specializes in art history, so she'll be available to help me when I need information.
I intended to donate plasma yesterday, but I contracted a cold, which means I must again wait another few days. Perhaps I am not destined to save the world.
[Lauree Frances Keith concluded this diatribe at 10:10 AM]
Predictable Old People
Sunday, May 15, 2005
I finally finished sorting and decorating the new dorm room, which is eerily similar to the old dorm room, minus the roommate and the dust. It also lacks my roommate's minifridge, television with built-in VCR/DVD player, laptop, and printer. I will miss those, more than I will miss her.
During the long hours between now and summer school, I must develop a grand money-making scheme in order to afford the lifestyle my white skin all but demands I engage. Where is my Prada? In two minutes I compiled the following short list:
prostitutionSuggestions are appreciated.
gambling
drugs
marriage
divorce
re-marriage
murder
donating plasma twice weekly
[Lauree Frances Keith concluded this diatribe at 11:48 AM]
I Won't Pay
Friday, May 13, 2005
Having no stereo, I did discover that silence is a dangerous sound, for I am then left, alone, with my own thoughts. My thoughts tend to worry other people.
Last night as I unpacked some clothes, I almost threw out an old, black bra, but not being one to waste things needlessly, I bethought, How may I transform this bra into something more useful? Then it dawned on me- a headband! It suits the purpose of holding my hair out of the scathing Lubbock wind exceptionally, without making my head too warm. The straps flap around behind my ears in a most charming manner. Tomorrow I will make an excuse to wear it out.
I am a genius.
Someone is running a tour group through the library. I thought about taking the scrap paper to hold up a sign as they walked by: "Turn Back Now". But I did not. Let the suckers learn for themselves [this is a jussive subjunctive clause- muchos gracias, Latin class].
My average for the semester is a 4.0, which means I had to have gotten a high "A" on the Latin final, for which I did study so thoroughly. I also had to have done marvelously in German, more so than I had thought I would. My cumulative GPA is now 3.903- hopefully, someone important will see that number and think, Why, who is this Lauree Frances Keith- she must be a genius! We have to find her posthaste to pay for her entire education.
[Lauree Frances Keith concluded this diatribe at 8:11 AM]
The World Is Mine
Thursday, May 12, 2005
I suckered Paul and Serg (student supervisors from work) to help me move my belongings to my new room. I lift more than Paul can, but Serg was most efficient; the process did not take too long.
As I loaded my stuff into the room, though, the cleaning ladies gave me pitying looks. I careth not- peace and quiet for a few weeks will be worth it. And I know several people who will be gone for only a week or two before returning to their apartments, so someone will play with me, eventually.
Bedtime.
[Lauree Frances Keith concluded this diatribe at 8:21 AM]
Society Gains By Producing Less X
Tuesday, May 10, 2005
I arose around four this morning for the German final at seven-thirty, which I felt well-enough prepared for until the past-perfect transliteration section, for I never bothered memorizing those forms in high school and neglected to do so, again, this year. I did have to construct a complete sentence for sich kammen, and I am completely confident that Ich kamme mir die Haare is richtig. I was drowsy as I took the exam, so in the middle of the essay about my favorite film (Lieblingsfilm), I wrote: Ich bin mude und ich bin kaput, for Eike's entertainment. The other day, I walked into his office and said, 'Ich habe ein Augeschmerzen' (I have an eye-ache), which he found lustig.
I enjoy making people laugh, but I admit it does not always occur by design. At work a few days ago, while Cecilia (a student shift supervisor) and Kimmy pored over Glamour, I commented, 'I would only take one of those if it provided economic stability,' in reference to a male model for some ghastly Tommy Hilfiger fragrance. They laughed, but I did not jest.
The dorms close down (i.e. everyone must go) at ten tomorrow morning- but the people occupying my summer room, in another hall, have not yet removed themselves. My CA agreed I should cart my belongings over there in a big pile and stand tapping my foot. After the one-thirty English final, I shall call every hour until they vanish. I packed everything, with the exception of stuffed animals that will be thrown into luggage bags. Kermit and I will wait this out together.
[Lauree Frances Keith concluded this diatribe at 9:32 AM]
Ninety-Six Facebook Friends (Ah, Ah, Ah)
Monday, May 09, 2005
Upon viewing William's profile, I was reminded that the school offers private instrument lessons for visual/performing arts credit. The woodwinds sections closed for the fall, but perhaps I could begin clarinet in the spring. Reeds aren't an expensive habit... I don't think...
Last night after eleven I began studying for the ancient technology exam, but then I contemplated the blister on my right index finger... for thirty-two minutes. I had developed it earlier, cutting beef and chicken fajita meat for Rebekah, and lay on my bed debating about whether to pop it. I did, eventually, puncture a tiny hole into the skin, at which point the bubble deflated, with a satisfactory pus emission that I wiped onto my Cat in the Hat pillow. I studied more for the final this morning, and should have at least received a "B".
Now I must check the hall office of my summer room to determine whether those occupants have left. If they have, I may move in tomorrow, after the English final.
Things to do, things to do.
But then, I shall have free time to read things!
[Lauree Frances Keith concluded this diatribe at 11:44 AM]
Minor Key
Saturday, May 07, 2005
Tonight is the last night I work until the summer session begins... which means no money, but also, no stress (besides the usual stress of having no money). Now that I am eligible, I might start donating plasma beginning next week, which I had intended to do at the beginning of the semester, but reneged on account of a lack of time to go by the office twice a week. The people I know who do it seem to have fun.
I confided to Leigh (my one-person fan club) a moment ago that I feel as though I, single-handedly, am disturbing the United States' economic balance, for I am currently in possession of unpaid-for goods from the minimart in which I work- with manager approval. The student managers allow everyone to take an enormous amount of drinks, snack foods, etc., which I find useful in consideration of the fact that I cannot pay for that stuff during the interim (the dining halls close), but it is an incredibly unwise business practice. Oh, well.
Amy and Robert depart with their stowaway dachshund, Buddy Holly, tomorrow morning at eleven prompt. Then I must wait around for a few days until the people occupying my summer room leave. The prospect of a single room very much appeals after having had to stare at Amy's accumulations this semester.
The Latin exam proved much less daunting than purported. I might, dare I utter the words, have made an "A". Now I must concern myself with German, English, and Ancient Technology.
[Lauree Frances Keith concluded this diatribe at 1:58 PM]
Chicken Pox Scar
Thursday, May 05, 2005
Yesterday I accomplished little, besides investing from Wal*Mart in two olive green washcloths, four tiny freezer containers, and a portable file storage tote. My splurge for the month of May was on a brown Sonic the Hedgehog t-shirt and the Willy Wonka film soundtrack (which is scrumdiddlyumptious).
To score a low "A" in Latin, I must make exactly a 100 on the final. Great. It is possible for me to score a 95-ish, and with the extra credit assignment, I might then have a 100. If only I had not butchered the conjugation section on the third exam, I would have had a "B" for it, instead of the 79. Scheisse.
The Latin and Greek Terminology final commences at 4:30. After I finish putting away laundry, I'll study my notes for an hour or two, then concentrate for the Latin exam taking place at 10:30 tomorrow morning. The instructor assured us our conjugations would be synopses rather than complete tables, id est, he will ask for the third person plural of some word. That means I must focus on recognizing all the subjunctive forms of verbs for sentence parsing. I must also make an ablative case chart to memorize (though I know most of them well enough).
The ablative case is my friend.
[Lauree Frances Keith concluded this diatribe at 7:53 AM]
German Poetry Hour
Wednesday, May 04, 2005
This morning I hobbled over to the recreation center at seven, showered afterward, and ate breakfast while studying the Latin and Greek terminology class notes. Along the walk back to my dorm, I passed through the Foreign Language building, where I chatted with Eike for a few minutes (I thought he was studying, but he told me before I left that he had been playing poker). He is an earnest person and pleasant to talk to.
Over the semester I attended several extra credit German department functions, although by the last two or three I had already accumulated the maximum number of points to apply toward the final. Usually Eike recommends we write a review of some sort, but since this last one (the graduate student poetry reading seminar) does not count, I wrote it stream-of-conscious style, in all capitals, with no space between the words:
ANANONYMOUSPIECEWHICHWASPARTOFTHEMIDDLEHOCH
DEUTSCHERAWALTERLOOKSWELL-RESTEDSKIP
AHEADTOMARTINLUTHER'SFORTY-SIXTHHYMNRECITED
BYBRIANRAH!RAHWESTUDIEDLUTHERINHIGH
SCHOOLEUROPEANHISTORYCLASS,BECAUSEHEWASEUROPEAN
IBUTCHEREDTHEPRONUNCIATIONOFTHATFIRST
POEM-MYVOICEISTOONASALLYBRIANISPROBABLYANACCEPTABLE
SINGER,BUTICANHARDLYHEAR
HIMABOVETHESPEAKERSIWONDERWHETHERTHISISTHETRUE,
KNOWNSCORE?NOBODYKNOWSTHE
MUSICALSCORESFORANYTHINGSHAKESPEAREWROTEGODISA
MIGHTYFORTRESSTRANSITIONTODEVIL
AFFIRMATIONOFGOD'SSUPREMACYCLASSICISMEIKEISREADING,
NO,ADAMISREADINGGUNTHER
YOUSHOULDBEMOREPATIENTANSCHWAGERKRONOSIHAVESEENTHIS
SPELLING,BUTITHINKMOST
PEOPLEACCEPTITILIKETHEROLLINGINTHISGUY'SVOICEIHAVE
PROBLEMSREPLICATINGTHOSE
VOCALIZATIONSORKUS--ISTHATGERMANFORHADES?NOWEIKE
DOESROMANTICISMHEIDELBERG
FRIEDRICHHOLDERLINORIGINALLYTHEOLOGYSWITZERLAND
FRANCECRAZY1800VISITFINISHED
BRIDGENICEARROWSAUFDIEBRUCKEMICHTRAURIGWOINDIE
FLUTENSCHICKSIGSKAL
DIEBURGIMHEITERNTALGARTENNICEFONTCHOICESHOOT,I
HAVEN'TCONTINUEDTHROUGH
LORELAYITISMOREFASCINATINGTOLISTENTOTHECLIFFDOESN'T
LOOKASPRETTYASTHEPOEMSOUNDS
BUTASUSUALIAMEASILYDISAPPOINTEDPLATT(E)DEUTSCHWHICH
SOUNDSFLATTERTOMEIDON'T
KNOWPRECISELYWHATSHE'SSAYINGBUTITSOUNDSLIKESOMEONE
SPEAKINGTHROUGHDOWN'S
SYNDROMEHEMISSESHISDEADBROTHERBYKLAUSGROTHANKEISFROM
HEIDEIREMEMBERHARPO
MARXMENTIONEDLOWGERMANANDHIGHGERMANSPEAKERSIMMIGRATING
TONEWYORKREGIONALIZED
THUSLYINNEIGHBORHOODSKLAUSHADANICEHOUSEWEEFORFIELDTRIPS
LOWDUTCHABOUTAFOXDANCING
WITHARABBITABOUTTOBEEATENDEMAKSIKDUTCHISWEIRDLOOKING
VICTORBORGEMMMAN
ACCORDIONDASENKOST!KUM,LATUNSTOSAM!IKKANNASDEDAM!
DINGEDICHSOUNDSDIRTYRAINER
MARIARILKETOFELLTHEWORLDTHROUGHMYWORDSDEATH,DEATHIS
GOODASCANDALOUSAFFAIRHAVE
YOUREADOGDENNASH?-IFCALLEDBYAPANTHER,DON'TANTHERMEINE
MUTTIHABE"POETRY"GELIEBT,
BERNA/BIRNA(?)ISVERYANIMATEDNOWONDERSHE'SSOSLENDERTHE
GIRLDOESN'TSTOPMOVING!
HERPRESENTATIONISVERYDIRECTANDCLEARTHELASTISBYBRECHT
HEATHER.THAT'SHERNAME
SHEISVERYNICEBUTIKEEPFORGETTINGHERNAMELOVEPOEMBYJAN
BRECHTLOOKSLIKEAGANGSTER
THISISAVERYPRETTYGUITARPIECEITISHARDTHOUGHTOLISTEN
TOTHEWORDSHECARRIESACIGAR
LIKEGROUCHOICHLIEBEGROUCHOWHOALSOPLAYEDGUITAR
THEBEERISGETTINGCOLD
I must be a pleasure to have in class.
[Lauree Frances Keith concluded this diatribe at 9:55 AM]
Other Hippopatomi
Monday, May 02, 2005
Eike has never read Ogden Nash, and after staggering dormward, horrified, I copied a few poetry selections for him (adding my favourite Thomas Hardy poem, as well). Then I began packing boxes, hopefully to store them tomorrow afternoon (if a ride is to be found), for I am ready to leave.
Feeling lethargic, I might go to the rec, then put myself to bed rather than study for final exams. Two whole days I have to devote to such matters before commencing with exam the first: Latin and Greek Terminology.
Ich bin schlafig.
[Lauree Frances Keith concluded this diatribe at 4:34 PM]
Snappy Snappy Alligator
Sunday, May 01, 2005
None of the honors society's volunteer projects are even projects; they're more "opportunity of the week" events, about which only the club officers care. The animals at the shelter needed donated items more than anything else, so we should have concentrated more effort to collecting things than wandering around in the sun for a couple of hours. It accomplished nothing.
Driving to the shelter, we noted the children's group home, and pulled into the parking lot on our way back to inquire of volunteer positions. However, the facility was closed, so Whitney and I must return at a later date. We both agreed volunteering somewhere on a regular basis, and of our own volition, is preferable to these member-point scrambles.
[Lauree Frances Keith concluded this diatribe at 7:21 PM]